Thinking about whether this trip was worth it or not, I feel guilty. So I write the names of those who will receive these gifts I bought– after all, Christmas is coming. When you have 200 dollars and a host apartment, you can do a lot in Bangkok. But me, I went to the malls.

My impression is that Bangkok life revolve literally and figuratively around commerce. Endless rows of clothes, branded and generic, lure people into the malls. Then they shop, locals and tourists, yes, until they drop. Plus who would want to walk the hot streets? Walking the BTS walkways isn’t as stressful as walking in between train stations in Manila  which of course, one should not do. In Manila LRT and MRT, you have to begin and end at the right stations. There is only one linkage, the Taft interchange, which is always understandably crowded. As you line up for the train ride, you need to have taken the strongest multi-vitamins that would protect you from air microbes roaming and hugging the dirty streets. But no sweat nor tears when you walk the BTS walkways in spite of the rush hours. No road-litter as well, which is what I really like.

Everything within walking distance from Chidlom to the National station via BTS consists of shops. I always tell my second sibling that once you see a mall, then you’ve seen them all, but in Bangkok, each mall has a unique character. My favorite is Siam Discovery for the simple reason that upstairs, on the fourth floor, is a display of household whatnots that makes me think of spaces as canvases for àrtistic expression. Of course given my limitation of 15 kilos I would not be able to bring home every bit and piece of cute decor. But then again, I tell myself that maybe, I could also find them in Manila.

Siam Discovery is a high end mall. On the extreme opposite are the night markets which open at around 4 AM and close at 6, and the wholesale stalls that begin at 6 and end at 8. Before 6AM today, my host and I went to BoBei, a wholesale market not very far from MBK. At Platinum mall, one can buy goods at very low prices, but whoever is trading can’t miss Bobei. Platinum price for cotton blouse 150 bht, Bobei 60. Platinum dress 250, Bobei 140 ; Toddler Tshirt at Asiatique 150, toddler Polo at Bobei 100, and so on. As you calculate and convert, you are definitely lured to buy more than one, to sell some.

Then at Central Embassy, there is a bookstore of coffee-table books. The books are displayed from floor to ceiling that the shelves are as wallpaper in the entire book space which is one floor big. The bookstore is called Open House. There are cozy sofas where you can fall asleep and cozy cafes and restaurants where business people talk to their clients . The Cinemas are in this same floor, but unless you are wearing expensive high heels and signature clothes, you will probably not even attempt going up, unless you love books. Because there is a certain look that fits the place, I somehow felt like a faint translation register. Those expensive books are obviously patronized by the rich in Thailand, how else would one explain their mere exibitionist display, thousands of them, in Open House. The coffee-tables are mostly on art and other hobbies, and the hardbound novels are all in Thai.

We also took a free Ferry to Asiatique, a bazaar organized into 12 warehouses. Who can exhaust even just Warehouse number 1 in an hour? But surely, Asiatique is also for people who loves sunset by the bay, a river cruise, some exotic Asian cuisine and products, and some truly organic food. The Asia goods are simply overwhelming, and in my panic, I ended up buying a generic T-shirt for my toddler nephew and a backpack for my sister. I really wanted to buy soft sculpure elephants but well, I just thought that to be really self indulgent, because what would I do with them? I also wanted the owls with free embroidered names of family members, only that I coudn’t be final with names of members of my core family, since If I have one, it is a tenuous one.

Mostly then, what I did was shop little for myself, window shop a lot, and shop for gifts. Therefore It seems as if this trip has been a complete waste of time and money. Did I feel some satisfaction in having bought something for my nephews and nieces, godmother, sisters and brother and brothers and sisters in law? Only a tiny little bit of satisfaction I guess. To make me feel better, I tell myself that at least I won’t be shopping for Christmas anymore. I had, in fact, advanced my Christmas shopping.

If I planned my itinerary, my 200 USD would have been stretched enough to buy street food good for five days, pay for entrances to Royal palaces and museums, and maybe even for the river cruise. Instead I let my host weave our city wanderings around her routine and schedule. We ended up eating in her spare but wonderful kitchen, and she treated me out most of the time. We had lunches and dinners in featured foodshops in the malls and enjoyed the international cuisine. We shared bits and pieces about our life updates and we encouraged each other in some domestic struggles.  She is very generous. I shopped for gifts in Bangkok because I had this extra money because of her generosity.

Between the two of us, she was the one more excited to buy things she could resell. At Platinum where I said I would buy a navy blue dress for my niece’s wedding, she seemed upset when after two visits,  and after having looked around quite a lot, I still couldn’t find what would suit my taste. When I finally, found one she remarked that that was just as well so our trip was not wasted.

Right now, my excess baggage requires that I rebook and buy additional kilos of luggage. I did not expect this of course. My academic self would have squirmed at the idea of “consumerism“. My perennial struggle as a christian is how to be the best steward of my time. Time wasted is creative output down the drain. But Bangkok is relentless. What it promotes on the surface is really this inexhaustible desire to buy and acquire. My host, whose contract ends next year after two years of working here exclaimed after paying only 700bht for six pieces of lovely blouses, “Had I been wiser, I should have bought more when I had the chance so I would have enough inventory to sell back home.” I wonder why this exclamation somehow makes me feel a lot less remorseful.

After a while, gym can get boring. If I do this everyday, I would certainly live longer, I think, given the number of calories I burn everytime I hit the treadmill, and after having consumed in the past three days plenty of fruits and vegetables. (Whatever the nutritionists say however, this is an expensive life). But this privilege of space and quiet here at Virgin Active lounge, Siam Discovery bldg. — at least in the morning because in the afternoon, it’s too noisy out here — is one other precious blessing (the gym is also a blessing) that I have indulged in through the kindness of Josil and Nor these past three days. Here I can have free coffee as I wait or blog or bum around after my quick exercise (treadmill 10 mins. Salt room 15 mins. Stretching 1min). I yet have to see some sights because after tonight, I will be done with the malls. What strikes me is that I can buy many clothes here at very cheap prices and then sell them for profit back in Manila. But right now, Cebu Pacific allows me only 7 kilos of luggage.

I had planned to write some of the dissertation proposal during this week-long holiday, but I have not done that of course, given the schedule Nor has provided with her working during the day. Tomorrow I will visit some sights and see some palaces. I will take pictures at Lumpini then I will go around the City. But tonight I need to buy my navy blue dress (but I wonder if this is more to please Nor than to satisfy myself.)

I’m seeing Bangkok, the “City of Angels”. Two days ago, I was mesmerized by the lights framing the Siam Building Square. I envy the railway tracks and walkways, so clean and systematic. I think about my daily train ride back in Manila, and I feel shortchanged. But then again, the lines here won’t be able to show me some real pictures about the heart of the people, the same corruption, the same impatience towards others, the same fight against poverty for some through illegal means. However progressive, Bangkok still have the pickpockets and the bag snatchers (beware of bag snatchers posts are installed so permanently on sidewalks) scouring the city for vulnerable locals and foreigners, child traficking and prostitution, and uncaring taxi drivers.

In Indonesia, I saw Art, but that’s because I went to Bali. I wonder what Jakarta had to offer. In Singapore what impressed me was the almost excessive compulsive orderliness. Public transportation is so efficient, and trash is nowhere to be found. In Cambodia, I saw maimed beggars, and heard sad stories of those who suffered under the Polpot regime.  In Sri Lanka I saw crows and other black things which somehow made it seem gloomy; during the time (2008) civil war was ongoing and I could feel the depression.

So countries can leave me only quick impressions which may not always be true. Yet what will always remain in memory is the kindness extended to visitors, the hospitality. I’m meeting Achera, an acquaintance, at 11 AM. I will take the BTS and I should be on my way now so I can leave allowances for getting lost and other contingencies. But I’m quite excited that this is going to be a break in a three day routine. My hosts are wonderful. And Nor said I should be back by 5pm so we could go to Platinum mall early. That is probably a tall order since I have no idea what Achera has in mind for me. But I’m going to comply.  I should at least make it easy for Nor who has given me plenty of time. Without Nor and Josil’s generosity and selflessness, this trip would have been completely meaningless. I’m going now — let me see a little bit more of Bangkok.